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Occasionally, when I’m sitting at my desk tapping away at some research, I’ll hear the ping of a new email from my manager. And, before even reading the subject line, my stomach flips and my brain tells me:
Ah, so your luck’s finally ran out.
Then I click the email and find it’s just an invitation to a Zoom bingo night or something equally banal.
Sound familiar?
If so, you’re probably experiencing imposter syndrome.
In case you’re uninitiated, let me explain:
Imposter syndrome is the tendency to feel like you’re a fraud in your career, having not earned your role and proven your competence, but instead lucked your way into it. You believe that you won’t be able to replicate your success in the future, and you always fear that a boss or colleague will catch on to your alleged hoax.
If you’ve contended with imposter syndrome, you’re in good company—according to a 2020 study, it’s estimated that up to 82 percent of people have experienced it at one point or another. Even Albert Einstein faced it; he’s quoted as saying, “The exaggerated esteem in which my lifework is held makes me very ill at ease. I feel compelled to think of myself as an involuntary swindler.”
My experiences with imposter syndrome
The reasons behind imposter syndrome are varied and unique to each person. Some research has linked family environment to it, while personality psychology research indicates that more neurotic people are at higher risk of experiencing it.
Ultimately, I can only speak to my own experience combating imposter syndrome here at Lab Manager:
I grew up around a lot of financial and job instability, which conditioned me to be paranoid about the stability of my own job. When I entered the workforce, I became hyper fixated on my own job performance. I thought that if I could always overperform, I would never be without a job.
So, with that naïve mindset brewing, I put myself through college working for a company that sold used lab equipment on eBay and LabX. Thanks to some articles I had written for that company, I was invited to write for Lab Manager on a freelance basis, and then a year later, I received an offer to join the team full time as associate editor.
When I received the offer letter, I couldn’t believe my luck. I suspected a carbon monoxide leak in the hiring manager’s office was to blame. After all, our readers have PhDs in hard sciences from prestigious universities. They’re expanding the boundaries of humanity’s collective knowledge, pressing forth into the uncharted.
Meanwhile, I’m a guy who took three years to finish community college.
Suffice it to say, I thought I was writing out of my league. And even after joining Lab Manager, that thought did not leave me for quite a while. But here I am, nearly three years later, still employed and improving, and not nearly as concerned about being outed as a fraud.
I tell you all this to say: If I can overcome imposter syndrome—even with my complexes and objective lack of formal credentials—you can, too.
Recognizing imposter syndrome
Imposter syndrome will manifest differently for each person, but here are some tell-tale signs:
1. Concerns that don't match reality
You might completely disregard objective data (say, positive performance reviews and good feedback). The fact you have successfully scaled the lab hierarchy from junior bench scientist to lab manager will seem inconsequential, and you’ll explain away successes as flukes. Every week feels like it could be your last, even though your superiors tell you how well you are doing and how valuable you are to the organization. You might even suspect that those praising you have ulterior motives, but their criticisms are ironclad truths.
2. Overcompensating
To avoid being identified as a fraud, people experiencing imposter syndrome will often try to overachieve in their work. Are you constantly working overtime, even when not truly necessary, to get in front of any remote possibility of failure? Would meeting a goal, but not exceeding it, feel like a failure to you?
When I worked as the interim managing editor for Lab Manager to cover a maternity leave, I worked hours of overtime every week and constantly pushed deadlines up. While the results of all that extra work were beneficial, by the end of the maternity leave I was left burnt out and exhausted. It was not sustainable. Had I trusted myself more, I likely could have achieved better work/life balance while still delivering what was needed as managing editor.
3. Mental and physical symptoms
Human psychology being the nebulous web that it is, it’s possible that your imposter syndrome could aggravate underlying conditions such as depression or anxiety. James Hambrick, PhD, a psychologist at nonprofit health care network Northwell Health, believes that those with anxiety or depression are likely at higher risk of experiencing imposter syndrome because their clinical criteria overlap with it. If you’re prone to anxiety or depression, understanding your triggers and how you can manage those feelings effectively may help you tamp down feelings of imposter syndrome as well. As to whether these conditions cause imposter syndrome or vice versa, Hambrick believes it’s an open question that “probably depends on the person.”
Personally, my impostor syndrome was closely tied to anxiety, which manifests both physical and psychological symptoms. For instance, whenever my boss would schedule an impromptu one-on-one on my calendar, I'd feel those anxious sensations kick in and start running through a list of anything I could have possibly done to warrant getting fired from my job. And until the meeting, my mind would be tinged with a frenetic, nervous energy, like the Talking Heads were holding a concert inside my skull.
4. Negative self-talk
There is a difference between recognizing your flaws and being overly critical of yourself. Next time you suspect imposter syndrome is rearing its head, examine your thought processes and self-perceptions. Are your thoughts simply acknowledging real flaws and considering how to grow past them? Or are they minimizing your value as a person and contributor to your organization?
Similarly, do you disregard positive feedback from others? According to McLean Hospital, another hallmark of imposter syndrome is “responding negatively to others’ positive feedback. For example, when people with impostor syndrome accomplish a task they’ve set out to achieve, they tend to disregard compliments.”
While you may not experience all these symptoms of imposter syndrome, the fact remains: Imposter syndrome will make you feel inferior, and these feelings will affect both your mental health and work output. It is vital that you begin developing effective mechanisms to fight imposter syndrome.
Managing imposter syndrome
In my time contending with imposter syndrome, I’ve learned a few things to help curb it:
1. Remember that you're in the lab for a reason
If you're hired, it means that your organization saw value in you—probably more value than you see in yourself. Hiring decisions are, generally, rational: Companies won't invest money in someone unless they’re confident that person will generate a positive ROI. So, remind yourself of that. Your organization wants you to succeed because your success is a leading indicator of the company’s success. The last thing they want to do is start from scratch with another new hire.
2. Mistakes are the best way to learn
As a scientist, you understand how vital it is to learn from what does not work. That’s the entire basis of the scientific method, and no doubt you’re comfortable with the process of formulating, experimenting on, and revising hypotheses.
But the lab is not the only place where experiments should happen. When you take a chance on a new project or idea in your career, do you allow yourself that same kind of understanding when it does not pan out as hoped?
Mistakes are the most effective form of learning. Making them says nothing about your ability to run a laboratory as long as you strive to learn from them and revise your approach. If you make no mistakes, it means you’re making no effort to improve—and stagnation will hurt both you and your lab. Giving yourself grace is key to managing imposter syndrome; learn more about how to do that in editorial director Scott Hanton’s recent Manager Minute.
3. Avoid analysis paralysis
Left unchecked, imposter syndrome can cripple your decision-making ability. Momentum is pretty much always better than stagnation, even if you don't know you're on the right trajectory. As a scientist, you may always want more data, but as a leader, you cannot defer making a decision perpetually. You will have to make calls based on limited information and ambiguity. Inevitably, some of those calls won’t end up being the best decisions, but that’s not a sign you’re an imposter—it’s a sign that you’re maintaining forward momentum, even in the face of challenges.
4. Questions ≠ incompetence
Asking questions does not indicate incompetence. Rather, it represents humility and a willingness to learn.
When Hanton interviewed me for the job I have now, at one point he asked me, “What do you consider to be your greatest strength?”
Sensing that this was the kind of guy who appreciates straightforward honesty, I said:
“I’m not afraid of asking really dumb questions.”
After I was hired, Scott told me that response was what got me the job. He then reminded me that there is no such thing as a truly dumb question, and that both journalists and scientists should always prioritize their drive to learn over their ego.
Being comfortable asking questions is emblematic of the growth mindset needed to succeed as a scientist and a lab manager. To make the best decisions for your lab, you should always ask for ideas and feedback.
5. Trust your gut
You’re a scientist. Your brain and analytical prowess are your greatest assets.
But sometimes, those strengths sabotage you.
Imposter syndrome preys on your fears and complexes, and the more you dwell on these feelings, the more power they have.
But with enough introspection, you may find a deeper, calmer voice inside you that knows what you’re feeling does not represent reality. That voice is who you really are, but it’s shouted down in times of stress.
Pay attention to that voice when your symptoms of imposter syndrome are not flaring up. When your mind is calm, do you feel confident in your role, proud of your accomplishments, and sure of your worth to the organization?
That is the voice you need to remember next time a wave of imposter syndrome washes over you.
Admittedly, this is a nebulous distinction to make. But not everything can be quantified. Sometimes, you just have to trust your gut.
Imposter syndrome can be beaten
Most people experience imposter syndrome, and yet, most people are also not fired for incompetence. Statistically, the odds are in your favor.
With that in mind, learn to recognize the symptoms of imposter syndrome, and then take one or more of the steps noted earlier to push back any feelings of self-doubt.
I’ve found that as I navigate imposter syndrome, my self-perception catches up to my successes, and my feelings of being a fraud gradually dissipate.